This is a draft version of a chapter from John Saye’s book, Standard-Issue Partner.

The deep and satisfying hum came from the engine of Flint’s aircar. “Simon!” he yelled. Can you cut us loose?”

Simon shook his head, clearing it, and produced a laser point of light from one of his fingers. He quickly burned through his own bindings, and very close to Flint, he managed those as well.

“Not going to do us much good though!” yelled Simon.

“Never fear!” yelled Flint, and below them, Flint’s aircar slowly lifted up to meet them.

Flint pulled himself into the driver’s seat, and Simon turned himself around, to sit down next to him. The cover slid over them, and they dropped off into the mountains, sliding behind one of them and landed on the smaller peak of another one.

Above them the ship was floating away, the large fish catcher already back in place.

“You think they know we escaped?”

“I don’t know, maybe. They’ll know for sure soon though.”

“I know we got a helluva mess here Flint!” said the Chief. “It’s just a mess all over. I’ve got the bureau coming down on me, the robot jocks out there trying to get their rocks off, and I’ve got some kind of sour smell under my nose that’s just making me sick! On top of it all, I’ve got the cops blasting me about their partners. Seems they’re all wondering if theirs are going to go berserk on them or not.”

Simon stiffened.

“Present company excluded Simon.”

“Not at all, sir. I think this illustrates the point.”

“Be that as it may, I’ve got a stiff call for you two. You’re going to have to take Roman down, and their whole lot with them.”

“Sir!”

“You started this Flint, with your trip out west. Nobody else is prepared to leave the city walls. In order to chase these guys, you’ll need everything you’ve got. The only question is what else can I give you?”

Flint started…

“If I may, sir?” asked Simon.

The chief nodded, “Yes Simon?”

“I was just thinking that what we really need is the scout vehicle we brought back earlier.”

“The salvage, yeah?”

“We could use it to get back in.”

“What do you want to do, plant a nuke in the ship?”

“Not really. I was thinking of something a little more drastic than that.”

“The whole building over the river?”

“It’s a start. They won’t be expecting a frontal assault, not this early anyway.”

“What if you’re wrong?”

“If I’m wrong, we’re screwed. If I’m right, we may still be screwed.”

“But we’ve got to try.”

“Okay,” said the Chief, “I’ll get you whatever you need. When do you want to leave?”

“As soon as the sun’s up.”

“What’s your first move?”

“We’ve got a transmitter to follow.”

“When did you get a transmitter off?” asked Flint.

“While we were falling to our death. It snapped onto the hull while you were driving.”

They loaded up the flier. It looked like more of a giant airworthy lobster than anything else. It was copper in color, it’s forward claws studded with weapons and laser turrets. The cockpit was ready for two, but there was plenty of room in the hold.

The chief marched in, followed by various police workers who were loading the bombs onto the little scout. “We thought we’d load some other things onboard for you.”

“Like what?”

“Well, for starters we’re loading on your aircar. It’ll fit in there, and if you have to ditch, it might come in handy.”

“Sounds good.”

“We’re also loading on some of our smart bombs, half-robot, and half bomb.”

“Those could come in handy. What about personal weapons?”

“That’s a good question. Simon’s being fitted with a series of new weapons right now, and I’ve got this for you.”

He handed Flint a large pistol, with a square barrel, and a massive laser sight.

“What is this thing?”

“It’s new. Care to try it out? We can meet Simon down at the firing range.”

Downstairs, in the firing range, Flint lifted the new sidearm towards the target and pulled the trigger. A single shot rang out, blasting a square hole in the center of the target’s chest.

“Try it again,” said the Chief, “Only this time, we’ll make the target a little harder to hit.

The chief hit a button, and a hole opened up in the side of the firing range, releasing a spherical robot that swung around the room. It started firing on Flint.

Flint raised the new sidearm, which seemed to be pulsing in his hands and pulled the trigger. The weapon seemed to adjust based on the opponent’s level of strength. This time a series of laser beams shot out blazing across the room and tearing the robot to pieces.

“One more level,” said the Chief.

From behind the regular targets, a set of iron double doors opened, and from behind, a towering robotic figure stood. It stepped forward, and Flint realized it was little more than a series of laser weapons on legs.

Flint raised the sidearm and blasted it, but this time the gun fired miniature rockets, which buzzed around and impacted the massive robot from all angles. It exploded and flopped over, its legs remained standing, though all the rest of it fell in a heap.

Flint holstered the weapon. “I think we’re ready to go.”

“Not quite. Wait until you get a load of Simon.”

Simon stepped into the room.

He blinked and his eyes were replaced with lasers. He fired them at a nearby target, disintegrating it. He blinked again, and his eyes returned to normal.

“That’s not all,” said the Chief.

Simon blinked again, and his hands swiveled and fell forward on a hinge. From the wrists protruded two of the square barrels. “He’s got double the firepower, and it’s all concealed.”

“This is the best part,” said Simon, “at least I think it is.”

His legs opened up from the knees down, and four mounted missiles descended and fired off into the target area. The targets were not hit with a precise blow. They were totally demolished. bits and pieces of the targets flew in all directions. They smashed off the walls and blew chunks and shards in all directions. There was smoke everywhere. Slowly, the curtain began to rise, and clear. Auto-vacs in the wall sucked the smoke from the building, and the alarm system came on, flashing red lights around them.

The Chief pulled the alarm switch, disengaging it.

“I believe we are ready to go then,” said Flint with a slight laugh.

“What?” said Simon.

“That’s something.”

“Oh, come on! That was great!”

“Yep, great.” Flint left the firing range, feeling somewhat uplifted.

Simon followed him out.

They returned to the hangar bay, to finish prepping the ship. Everything was loaded, the ship was fueled, weapons were deployed, and all the safeties were off.

Simon and Flint boarded, choosing ladders on both sides. They put on flight helmets and settled themselves in.

“Rollback the dome,” said Flint.

Simon hit a switch and the side of the building rolled back like an enormous garage door.

“You want to drive?” asked Flint.

“Are you serious?”

“Take us away. I’ll start with the scanning. I want to make sure these bastards aren’t hiding over the hill.”

“You got it.”

Simon pulled the ship up, and took her out, gliding over the rooftops. He was taking the corners a little closer than Flint would have liked, but he was a robot. Maybe he did everything like this. He was going to have to get used to it eventually.

“I have a question for you Simon.”

“Yes?”

“What happens when I get too old to be your partner?”

Simon thought about this for a moment.

“I don’t know.”

“Isn’t that special.”

“I suppose it is. I really have no idea, I assume I’ll be reassigned to a rookie.”

“Won’t that be nice.”

“Of course that won’t happen until after you’re dead.”

“No?”

“No. I’m assigned to you for life, that’s the first part of the deal when you sign on to take a robotic partner. But don’t worry about that anyway. You’re ninety-five. You’ve still got a good hundred years in you at the least.”

“I suppose you’re right.”

“I know I’m right.”

“Are you always right?”

“No. I wasn’t right about you.”

“Oh yeah?”

“For a human.”

“That so?”

“For a while there I thought you took some awful risks.”

“Hmm…”

“And then I realized that you weren’t taking risks that you hadn’t calculated. You knew exactly where all those dives were headed, and how all those acrobatics were going to pan out. You even calculate where all your shots are going to land. Sometimes even the missed ones, for effect. You’re a genius.”

“Well, when you put it like that…”

“Of course you’re also a tremendous screw-up, and I think you know it.”

“What?”

“For instance, our man Roman is on the monitor screen, at least the signature of his big fishing craft, and you haven’t noticed it yet. I managed to continue driving. If it’s one thing humans can’t do very well, it’s multitasking.”

“Ah-ha, you see there, they’re right where I said they’d be. I can’t multitask… About that, you might be right, but I can still run circles around you with experience.”

“Can you?”

“I hope so, otherwise we’re all going to be robots, and there won’t be any humans on the force. Take her down slowly, we don’t want to draw too much attention yet.”

“Gotcha. But there you might be right. I think the use of human/robot teams is crucial. You’ve got the scientific half, good analyzing, taking samples, killing anything we need to, and then there’s you, with a completely chaotic mind”

“Chaotic?”

“Sure, what better way to make sure you’ve got the best of both worlds? I can be anal and analytical, and you can always come at a problem from a different angle. It’ll be as if there’s nothing we can’t solve together.”

“It’s also like having a laptop that talks, and walks around and does things before I’m ready for them.”

“This is also true, and here is an example.”

Simon dived out of the way of an oncoming missile. It barely missed them, grazing the ship underneath. Simon flipped the ship over and hugged the ground. His work at the controls was totally precise. He was able to hug the rocky ground in a way that Flint knew there was no way he could do.

“Flint?”

“Yeah?”

“You want to get on those guns?”

“Oh, yeah!”

Flint took the controls of his weapons station and started firing rounds off. He launched rockets and watched as like size and shaped ships plummeted to the Earth around them.

“Nice work,” said Simon.

“You’re not the only one that’s good at stuff.”

“You seem to be doing well.”

“You could call it ‘Particularly Gifted’ but I like to think of it as Damn Good!”

He blazed away at the oncoming craft. The large ship blasted off and began to lumber into the sky.

“Now they’ll send out the big guns,” said Simon.

“The more the merrier. Bring ’em on!”

Simon dodged and dived, and Flint continued to blaze away.

“So, what’s your plan?” asked Simon.

“Well, we’re going to get hit, and go down, then when they send out a search party, we’re going to get aboard the ship.”

“How’s that going to work?”

“Watch and learn amigo. Turn into a blast.”

“What?”

“We’ll survive the crash.”

“But…”

“No arguments!”

Simon shook his head and then performed a brilliant move that clipped them by a stray laser beam without really doing much harm to the ship.

“That was great, now hit one of the big missiles.”

“Flint, now come on!”

“Do as I say!”

Simon twitched and then hit one of the main missiles. On impact, it hit the ship and the front exploded in a giant fireball.

“Perfect!”

“Perfect!? We’re going down now.”

“No, we ain’t. Watch. Come on, we’re getting into the aircar.”

They trundled back to the cargo hold, and got down in the cockpit of the car, the original ship swishing and turning around them as they headed for the hillside.

At the last second, with the hover car’s engines roaring, they ejected, and quickly zipped down by a hillside, hugging the earth for cover. The stolen ship smashed into another hillside, exploding in a shower of a thousand pieces.

“Perfect.”

Simon just shook his head.

“Watch.”

The ships returned to the mother, their job complete, and the whole thing settled down on the dusty plain, coming to a rest.

“Now that they think we’re dead, we can sneak up, and see their next big meeting.”

“What makes you think they’ll have one.”

“These kinds of guys always have big staff meetings to endear their henchmen to them. It’s the kind of thing they do.”

“Oh.”

“Then why did we have to blow up the scout?”

“Chaotic, right?”

“Right.”

“Works don’t it?”

“Unfortunately, yes.”

They powered down the aircraft, and suited up, taking as many firearms as they could take with them.

They left the aircar behind and crouched into the brush on their way around the hill to the ship. Flint touched a button on his belt, and the hovercar lifted off and flew out of sight.

“Are you getting rid of it?”

“Nah, just keeping it out of range. If we need it, we’ll get her back in no time.”

“I’ve been wondering.”

“Yeah?”

“How come the aircar never needs to be recharged and I have to go into the charger every couple of days at least?”

“Good question. Some of the robots we’ve built have power plants capable of sustaining them for several months, and it’s not a problem.”

“What’s the catch?”

“They were about fifty feet tall. Only good for warfare.”

“Any still around? They might be useful.”

“Not that I know of.”

Flint scrubbed through the brush, and on the other side of a small embankment was the ship. It sat there, gleaming in the sun like an overgrown, waterlogged frog.

“So, how are we going to get inside this time?”

“The easy way.”

“Right. Doesn’t the easy way for you entail some kind of acrobatic, hair raising stunt?”

“What, you can’t keep up with the old man?”

Simon shrugged.

“Don’t worry. I’m thinking of something much less dangerous this time.”

“Sure.”

“Don’t believe me?”

Simon shook his head.

“Watch.”

A series of robots were loading boxes full of spare parts onto the ship. They were in a series and locked in a small hangar. The robots were lifting them onto a large conveyor belt that snaked its way into the bowels of the ship.

“What, you want us to get into that storage bunker and slip into one of the crates, and somehow not be noticed by all these guards and robots. Hell if I can spot them they’ve likely spotted us anyway.”

“They haven’t spotted us, and no, not the crates, at least not yet. It’s the belt.”

“What about the belt?”

“Under the belt.”

“But that’s going back into the bunker.”

“Right, and we can hop a crate once we’re inside.”

“Bonkers.”

“What?”

“Bonkers.”

“Come on.”

“Oh, what the hell? Anything for a short life.”

They snuck up to a bend in the conveyer belt, which turned out to be not such a spectacular feat, and then grabbed on, latching themselves to the underside of the belt. It zigzagged its way back into the bunker, and they were thrown off at the end, crashing into a pile of rubbish.

Two loading robots were in there, pulling the manual labor, pulling boxes and putting them on the rack.

“Just what I was hoping for. They can’t recognize a fat rabbit. Pick a crate.”

They picked a large crate towards the back of the room, discarding some of the innards, and pushing in some foam packing material to make the trip just a touch less jumpy.

They sealed the lid on themselves with a hand tool of Simon’s just seconds before they were lifted into the air by the packing robots.

Inside the crate it was dark. Lighting a flashlight only revealed the packing peanuts close to their faces. They swam through the plastic chips, searching for each other’s lights.

Outside the crate, it slid up the ramp, and into the ship, where an additional three thousand pound crate was dropped on them, sealing them in tight.

“Terrific,” said Simon.

“Don’t panic.”

Flint grinned, but Simon couldn’t see him through the peanuts.

“Now what?”

“Now we wait.”

There was a cold hard silence. Then they were able to discern footsteps around them. Some were human, bare feet padding on the concrete deck, and the others were robotic in nature, a little too regular for the common man to make his footsteps.

Soon the engine started, and after a lurching motion that was better, upending Flint’s guts into the packing material.

They were off.

The trip was long and hard. The hum of the engines beneath them just made Flint want to go to the bathroom. Before long, the crate above them was lifted, and the sunlight of the setting sun poured in on them, along with the dark outlines of two loading robots.

Red lights flashed on their heads, and with a shout, and a blast from Simon’s arm pistol, they were both silenced. They hit the floor with a clang.

“That’s made a noise.”

“Good bet they’re coming.”

“Come on.”

They leaped over the side of their recent enclosure and dove into the tank. Recent fishing had been done. They landed on a small sea of recently caught, flipping, fiddling, fighting salmon.

“What the?”

Simon reached over and pushed Flint under the water just as two guards walked by.

They popped up.

“That was close,” said Flint.

“Could have been closer. Here…”

Simon handed him a small re-breather. “You know how to work this?”

“Yes.”

“Good, now get back under!”

They both dived and were surrounded by the fish, who seemed to have taken a liking to them, protecting them from getting a full-on look at anything.

Lasers blazed above them. There was a lot of shouting, and then the worst seemed to happen, the fish opened up, just a natural swimming pattern, but there it was, or rather there they were above them, the two Romans.

“Well,” said the fake Roman, “What do we have here?”

“Looks like some fish,” said the real one.

“I think we’re going to have to throw them back.”

The other nodded.

“You know, I don’t even like the smell of fish.”

“Are you thinking what I’m thinking?”

“I think so.”

“What about the slaves?”

“They can starve until we get another catch. What do you say?”

They smiled and together pulled a series of levers. Below them, a bubble surfaced. Then another much larger one. Then all began to spiral out of the bottom of the tank. The fish were falling, the water was plummeting to the ground, and so were Flint and Simon. Instinctively they pointed their grapples to the sky and fired them. Latching onto the rim of the tank, they screamed back up into the sky, landing on their feet in front of Roman, and the other Roman.

“Clever,” they said together. “Clever indeed.”

“We’re full of surprises,” Flint and Simon said together.

They punched the two Romans and were punched back. The robot guards began to provide cover fire, blazing around them. The two Romans split up and headed in different directions.

“It’s time to take this place apart,” said Simon.

“I think you’re getting the hang of this, said Flint.

They opened fire and decimated the oncoming force. Robot arms and legs went everywhere. Some landed in the tank, others seemed to stick to the walls, there was such a level of salt and dust in here, and others seemed yet to explode right in front of them. Their pistols chose the appropriate firing method, sometimes dispensing bullets, lasers, or rocket grenades depending on the target. At one point a series of large circular robots floated into the room, and Simon’s gun made mincemeat out of them, but not before one of Flint’s grenades shot out and blew a hole in them from the back.

They checked their weapons after a quick re-load. Everything was smooth and normal again, save for the bodies everywhere anyway. Flint kicked one of them and its head popped off, skittering up the metal flooring.

“Let’s do it.”

Simon nodded.

Together, they laced the tank with high-end explosives, each the size of a deck of cards. Every once-in-a-while they had to shoot off another guard but were otherwise left unhindered. When they were all up, they activated them, and one-by-one a little green light came on in sequence.

“We’re set.”

They jumped down through the opening at the bottom of the tank, and sailed down to the ground, within sight of the robot’s facility, by the use of small extendable hang gliders.

The ship lumbered in the distance, badly shaken. From the look of it, several ships were abandoning, heading for the robot facility.

It rocked with the first explosion, which sent a plume of smoke from the lower hold of the craft.

They watched as a second, and a more powerful explosion rocked the ship, destroying its stabilizers and knocking it over so that it seemed to drift up the river on its side.

Flint called his aircar, which came, racing up from beyond the hill.

Simon just watched as the last explosion hit the fishing ship, and it exploded in a blaze of light. It crashed into the river, and upended, slowly sinking in a cloud of steam and bubbles. It managed to get halfway sunken under the river’s surface when it stopped, resting quietly on the bottom.

As soon as Simon was sure it was over, a secondary explosion rocked its core, and the entire ship exploded sending clouds of smoke and ash into the sky. The remainder of the craft sunk under the water, separated from its upper half. It bubbled away into the murky green.

Flint and Simon climbed into the hovercar and Flint put it in gear. “You still got a charge of grapple bolts?”

“As always.’

“That’s the way it should be.”

“Can’t leave home without ’em.”

“Hell, I even take one to bed.”

“Flint…”

“What?”

“You have issues.”

“I know. It’s time to blow up that place over there but first I think we need to split up.”

“Sir?”

“Roman, and his metallic brother Roman, just made their exit, but they went in separate directions. Now I’m not sure, but I’ll bet that the best way to stop those two is going to be to split up.

“I’ll go after the robot,” said Simon.

“And I’ll take the meat stick.”

“We’ve still got to get closer though.”

“True. Hop in.”

Simon slid aboard the aircar, and Flint took off. They kept low, but the security was really on now, they really didn’t have a chance of getting to the city without attracting more attention.

Underneath Flint’s car, the Real Roman hung on for his life. Without a word, he clung to their frame, beyond that he knew nothing. All he did was concentrate on being alive, and stuck to the vehicle. He closed his eyes and pulled himself up straight.

They took the low road, skimming close to the bushes and trees, bumping Roman’s ass all the way, but he never made a sound, at least not an audible one, and pulled up under the city.

Flint pointed his pistol to the underside of the structure and pulled the trigger. From his weapon out streaked a small grenade-like missile. It soared up and impacted the building, blowing a hole in one of the entry bays. A ship fell from the bay and crashed into the river below. He guided the ship up, and into the bay, then locked down his car, and jumped out.

“Simon?”

“Flint?”

“Good then. We’ll split up, and meet back here to blow this place to smithereens.”

“Good luck.”

“Do robots believe in luck?”

“We don’t believe in anything, but I believe in you.”

They parted. Simon made it through a blast door and on into the building. Roman fell from the bottom of the flyer. He was no longer able to hold on.

Flint stooped to look under, his gun drawn and armed.

Their eyes locked.

“Roman.”

“Flint.”

Roman got gingerly to his feet.

“It seems you have the advantage, Flint. Why not go ahead and shoot me?”

“I want to know a couple of things first.”

“Like what? Would you like to know if I ever thought I could succeed?”

“Yes.”

“Then I believe the answer to that one is Yes, and I still think I can.”

“You’re nothing.”

“No. I’m afraid not.”

Flint’s trigger finger was getting itchy.

“No the robot,” said Roman, “I mean… There’s no telling whose side he’s on now is there?”

“What are you talking about?”

“He’s a robot. Do you really think he’s not going to turn?”

“What do you mean?”

“Come on! He’s a robot, you’re a human. He probably sleeps in your closet or something. Tell me, just how do you treat your robots?”

“Well, I haven’t…”

“Haven’t thought of it, right, that’s what I keep telling you, folks. When are you going to wise up?”

“Hey… We… I…”

“That’s just what I thought. They’ve got rights too you know! It’s not what all of this is about. I’ve got to tell you, this is about the best way to get into some kind of arrangement with them, I mean before the end of the world and all there is are robots. You know they’ll want to vote soon?”

“Vote?”

“What is all this some kind of a news flash for you? They’re the superior beings now, they are the next step. Human evolution is in the crapper once these guys take control, and they will, so I may as well be on top.”

“On top?”

If he could just keep him talking he could get through this.

“Nah, you don’t even know. You’re all a bunch of losers. That’s the problem with humanity.”

“The problem?”

“Yeah, you’re all a bunch of suckers!”

Roman blasted Flint in the left shoulder. The burn was deep, but not that bad, mostly surface scarring. Flint hit the floor and tried to push himself to his feet.

“And that’s another thing with you humans, always sitting in your towers, playing God. Who’s gonna clean up this mess? Nuclear radiation, you’re dumping into what you call ‘The Wastelands,’ it’s all a crock of…”

“The wastelands aren’t from nuclear waste; we’re not even using any.”

“The hell you aren’t. You don’t even know, do you? You don’t know how bad it really is. You’re pathetic.”

Flint moved to get up but thought better of it. He wasn’t really ready for it. His shoulder gave, and he slumped back down to the ground.

“So you want to know why we’re after your precious cities?”

“Tell me.”

“They’re the last place left unless we start hiking it to the moon, and while that’s great for the robots, it doesn’t much make for a good day on my end of the spectrum.”

“That’s right. You’re human. You’re just like the rest of us, aren’t you?”

“No, I’m not.”

“You’re just as self-centered, and egotistical as all the rest of us. It’s you! You’re the fool in all of this! You’re the one who can’t keep it together!”

Flint pushed up on his burned shoulder.

Roman sat down next to Flint and toyed with the gun in his hand.

“The thing is Flint, I could end it all right now. I could kill us both, and it wouldn’t make a lick of difference in the long run. Sure the Robots would be without a leader for a while, but they would straighten that out, and now the thing is set, they are coming, and there’s nothing that’s going to stop us. We could both die, at this moment, and it wouldn’t make a damn.”

“You know, you’re right. It wouldn’t. It wouldn’t make a damn. We could both kill each other right now, and there’s not a thing that could make any of this any better.”

“Now you’re getting it.”

“Yeah, it’s like a tidal wave just hit me. It’s all filling in, all the blanks; it’s all about this moment. It’s just the ticket. I know it’s something that we’re all going to be in for later.”

“Now you’re starting to see it. What’s it like? What do you think?”

“Let’s do it, right now, together. We’ll blow our brains out.”

Flint held the square barrel to his head and began to twitch at the trigger.

Roman stood up and put his own laser to his temple.

They stared each other down, first the left eye, and then the right. They came together in a momentary glance, and their fingers began to pull on their triggers.

Sweat poured from their brows.

“Are you ready?” asked Roman.

“Are you?”

“Let’s do it. Let’s bring all of this to a spectacular end.”

“In one fell swoop, let’s bring the robots into the future, end the debate on evolution, and make it all happen.”

They pulled their triggers…

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